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Deepen your understanding of the importance of personal boundaries and learn how to set healthy boundaries. Read the following article and listen to the dharma talk about setting personal boundaries by Phillip Moffitt, then in your mindfulness practice reflect on the questions provided.
For Your Reflection:
1. Ask yourself whether you believe better understanding boundaries is worth your attention. Why did you answer the way you did? Do you imagine yourself being good at boundaries? Would others agree with you? Think about this in relation to your ability to maintain your own boundaries as well as respect the boundaries of others.
2. Think of a situation in which your boundaries were violated. Can you remember how it felt in you body? Can you remember the turmoil in your mind? What did you do? Did you blame the other person, or did you blame yourself? Was your response harsh? How do you think you should be responding toward yourself when you’ve let your boundaries be crossed? Is it better to be angry or to be compassionate? How did you behave toward the other person? Again, how do you aspire to behave?
3. Where in your life are you most likely to struggle with your boundaries being violated? At work? With a family member? In social situations? Or with people who have a certain personality? Are you willing to practice mindfulness of your boundaries in this area over the next six months?
4. In what areas of your life do you tend to violate the boundaries of others? Reflect on why you do this. Is it lack of awareness, an overwhelming need, or some perception of what the other person is communicating? Do you get an emotional reward when you violate the boundaries of another? Does it make you feel powerful or superior?